Interview Preparation

Capitalize on the Crisis: Break free from ordinary

Whatever common sense hasn’t already told you, approximately twelve million websites will, repeating one another as they lay siege to everything you always already knew. And, with the benefit of all that routine advice, you will deliver a competent but uninspired interview, which in its turn will yield another ordinary position in which you will demonstrate your competence. Translation: All of it frighteningly ordinary.

Among the ordinaries with which you have become frighteningly familiar, consider the working definition of “crisis” - you remember, that thing about challenge meets opportunity. Face it: if you’re unemployed you have a crisis on your hands, and it appears in several different dimensions. Most people identify themselves by and with their jobs, so you’ve got an identity crisis roiling inside you as a financial crisis ravages your wallet. Naturally, your loved one are a little concerned about you and a lot concerned about their next meals, so you have a host of relationship crises breaking-out all around you. And, completing the perfect portrait of contemporary American crisis, your health has suffered from stress, poor appetite, depression, and lack of exercise.

Carpe diem, amigo. Accept the challenge and embrace the opportunity. Break out of the routine, taking a stand for your original, classic, inimitable authentic self. Then, considering all the preparation and presentation your new repertoire of interview skills, get in training for the job that genuinely matches you, your talent, your skills, your personality, and especially your passions. Risk it. You have absolutely nothing to lose.

Foundation: Objective, Honest Self-Assessment

Sit down with a pencil and paper - no, not your laptop or desktop or handheld or tablet, but a pencil and paper; remember them? Ask and answer: At what am I really good? Yes, you must repeat the “really” - or substitute “exceptionally” or “all-star”. Because you’re probably not feeling the peak of your perk, you will feeling tempted to scrawl “nothing”. Not acceptable. At what do you excel? Anything. Something. As long as you own and dominate it. Repeat the question and develop a new answer. Repeat one more time just to make certain.

Ask and answer: At what do I absolutely suck - “suck” here is a technical term signifying you are so terrible at it you defy even pathos or bathos, because you just “suck”. After you have identified this tragic flaw in your otherwise pretty accomplished character, develop a brief narrative which demonstrates how awful at this thing you really are. Now, raise your right hand in the Boy Scout’s oath position, and promise yourself you never-ever will attempt that thing again.

Ask and answer: About what do I genuinely feel passionate? Acknowledge that, yes, in your current somewhat desperate jobless condition, ennui has set-in and passion seems a foreign concept. Ransack your memory and experience. The answer will appear. Then, once you have identified your passion, write a brief narrative showing the time when you most intensely felt and acted on this primary primal passion.

Ask and answer: At what would I like to become really proficient? Yes, once again, you must repeat the “really”. Declare your desire; give words and voice to your ambition. “I want to become the all-star, all-time, hall of fame [your desire goes here]. Combine your exceptional skill with your powerful passion, factoring in compelling desire, and you have you’re the description of your next job. Begin training and applying for these jobs which perfectly correspond with your self-assessment.

Development: A journal, the Old-Fashioned Kind

Your intrepid pursuit of the ideal job becomes your full-time occupation until you land the job of your dreams and the Wall Street-style salary it carries. And, apropos of all professional pursuits, you will document every move you make and every step you take and every faux pas and every epiphany and pretty much everything you think, feel, and learn along your journey to the ultimate paid endeavor.

For this, you may employ post-modern technology, but you may not post it on the internet or leave it anywhere anyone else may view it. Your journal remains absolutely confidential. It should contain every snippet and singlet of information about your job of choice, the requisite skills, the monumental challenges, the staggering rewards, and everything else that a serious pro would have to know.

If you are strategically and internet savvy, however, you will capitalize on some of the stuff in your journal to post professional blogs, so the world will begin identifying you in your new profession. That enhances your credibility and might even attract recruiters. Stranger things have happened.

Now that you have begun to identify yourself in your new professional capacity, revise and update your resume to make it fit your job-of-choice, and start getting it out there. Revise your cover letter, too, making it simple, direct, and perfectly tailored to satisfy the people who will beg for your services in the job that exalts your special skills and arouses your perfect passion.

Command of Language: Reading

Consistent with the honesty and objectivity you manifest in your self-assessment, you here ought to acknowledge that, just like every other American beyond elementary school, everything you know about the English language has come to you via cable television, that text messaging has ravaged your ability to spell or speak in complete words, and the last time your read a book - not counting the Cliff’s Notes - was when you finished the last of the Dick and Jane series.

Acknowledging this fact, you will act on it. Begin reading…all the time. From books. Remember them? Read about your new profession; read biographies of people who pioneered your new profession, and then read their autobiographies, and then read the unauthorized biographies where you find “the truth of their lives”. Read critiques of your new profession and consider responding to them; write about all you read in your journal, and then return to reading. Read literature. When you attempt it as a grown-up and without a teacher examining your multiple choices, you will discover The Great Gatsby is, in fact, a good book…as are most twentieth century American classics.

And then stand back in awe of your own self, learning what most authors have learned through harsh experience just like yours: Because you have devoted yourself to the printed word, you now command it. And what you can do in print, you easily can do in spoken language. In other words, you have become considerably more articulate - more descriptive, more powerfully persuasive, and almost dynamic.

Public Speaking: Community College and Toastmasters

Given that you have gained command of the English language, and given that your interview for your dream job will put your new-found skill to the ultimate test, go and try it out on some real people. Sign-up for a speech class in community college, or join your local Toastmasters group; did you know Toastmasters awards trophies almost every week? How cool will those babies look on your mantle and then displayed in your new office?

Of course, you understand your own ulterior motive. Just as everyone believes he or she is a rock star while singing in the shower, everyone can become a motivational speaker standing before the bathroom mirror. Can you do it in the presence of real people? Can you do it in front of a classroom full of college students, most of whom would rather be at home playing World of Warcraft? If you can dazzle the thumb-text set, you know you’ve got it goin’ on. And you have known from the start that, when you go into that magic hour, the interview for the dream job, you will have to dazzle - blow the interviewers right out of their cushy adjustable chairs, making them sit up and maybe even salute. Practice in a safe, secure classroom under adult supervision. Risk it. You have nothing to lose.

Timing: The Perfect Hour of the Perfect Day

On the day of the interview, the interview is your least concern, because it is the part you cannot control. Do your best to arrange the rest of your day to minimize your stress and anxiety: wedging in an interview between a dentist’s appointment and the afternoon car-pool will not promote your best display of your considerable gifts. Try to set the interview at your optimum time of day: if you just cannot make yourself a morning person, do everything in your power to avoid early morning interviews.

You may, however, influence your interviewers’ moods and frames of mind by the timing of your interview: Last interview before lunch - the interviewers feel tired, hungry, bored with listening to candidate after candidate proclaiming, “I’m really a people person!”. Not an advantage. First interview after lunch - the screeners are full, complacent, probably sleepy and maybe even struggling to stay awake. Also not an advantage. Mid-afternoon - the panel sees light at the end of the tunnel, and their lunches digested, they feel strangely refreshed. Possibly an advantage. Last one of the day - the interviewers have kids at daycare, they have nothing for supper, they have had to abandon all hope of picking-up the dry cleaning, and they haven’t accomplished any of their own tasks, because they have been in interviews all day. One of the worst spots. Optimum time - second or third in the morning, because the groggy has worn-off and the coffee has kicked in; most people are most productive at mid-morning.

In the interview’s immediate aftermath, send an e-mail thanking the interviewer for the opportunity to meet and speak with her and to learn more about the company; you appreciate the interview’s substance and format, and you especially appreciated the question about [whatever it is you do especially well], sincerely, etc. Then, because e-mail got you warmed-up for more formal, traditional composition, you neatly will write the same basic message on a real thank you note, and drop it in the mail.